Wildflower Writes

I’ve always had a problem with boundaries . It’s not due to some traumatic event in my childhood. Rather, it’s a defective personality (so to speak). I am a people pleaser. And a perfectionist. So I not only want to make people happy, I want to make everyone happy, all the time. I’ve grown up and I’ve realized that one person can’t possibly please everyone she meets. I’ve also decided it’s okay to say “no” to a lot of good things: projects, organizations, and ideas, when I don’t have the interest, time, or ability to see them through. Now I’m in a situation where I’m really struggling to create or maintain boundaries as needed- mostly with myself! I work from home. I also manage the home. So, while I’m trying to work on a grant proposal or write a blog, that growing pile of laundry is nagging me. My daughter comes home from school and wants to talk. My husband can’t find his keys. My sister needs help with her kids. While I am so glad to have a more flexible schedule so that I ...

It's great to have goals and to be able to work steadily toward them.  In my experience, however, only the most die-hard determined people can make a plan and stick to it without fail.  Often, these people are so driven their health and relationships suffer.  Moving forward is important.  Yet, as we know, life happens.  People get sick; people lose their jobs; people make poor decisions.  When life happens, it's tempting to get frustrated and give up.  "Apparently, it wasn't meant to be." So, maybe it isn't going to be as easy as you thought.  Maybe it's going to take longer.  Maybe after some long, hard thought, it's not really what you wanted after all.  That's okay.  Just don't give up.  Adjust, be flexible, arrange your time and money around your values.  Think about how your family and health figure into your goals. Along with being flexible, you have to be resilient .  You can't let little t...

So, it's technically not a word, or it wasn't until 2000, but getting from where you are to where you want to go takes more than a simple strategy.  It takes some serious strategery.  Strategery is about working backward in time from your goal to your present situation.  The important thing to remember is that it doesn't matter where you are now.  What matters is you are fully aware of where you are and are prepared to move in a planned direction.  No more treading water, no more procrastinating, no more wishing and hoping, no more fuming and bitterness, no more regret.  The past is the past, and it's unchangeable.  Where you are is unchangeable.  Where you are going is up to you. It's not enough to have a goal or want it really bad.  You have to strategerize a plan.  Do you want to get a novel published?  Have you started writing it yet?  When do you want to have it completed by?  How many words a day would tha...