Just Fine

Rightly or wrongly, when it seems like the same song is on every time I get in the car, I think maybe God is trying to tell me something. 

Lately I hear the song “Fine” by Jaymes Reunion ALL THE TIME.  I like it because it gives a new perspective on the struggles we all face in life.  It starts with a question about love and life… and the answer seems to be that we don’t truly appreciate anything until we’ve had to live without it.

The chorus goes like this:

You never really loved until you watch it fall apart
And you never really lived until you felt like you can die
And you never really stood until the weight has pushed you over
You’re pickin’ up the pieces just to find
You’re doin’ just fine

It gets me every time.  What is love if it isn’t tested?  How sweet is life when it’s been plucked from the jaws of death?  How much stronger are we when we’ve overcome obstacles.  Even if it seems like life is falling apart, maybe it’s just coming together.

For years I’ve wanted to “have it together.”  I wanted the career, the family, the ministry, the organized household, the interesting hobbies, and the ability to manage it all with style and grace.

I was informed very early on, but am just now starting to believe that you can’t have it all.  Life is full of hard decisions that we have to make, sometimes to further another person’s goals instead of our own. 

I’m also starting to believe that I’m not supposed to have it all together.  Life is an imperfect, unpredictable, tangled web of desires, responsibilities, intentions, experiences and hopes.  Although I wish for a carefree lifestyle, I know that the things that hurt the most may cause the most growth.  Everything along the way, for better or for worse, makes me who I am. 

So, I’m thinking that I am still working on truly experiencing love, joy, and life.  I’m okay with taking the scenic route to get there.