Discipline?

There used to be a sign on a bulletin board at the YMCA that said, “Discipline is knowing what you really want.”  I used to glare at it every time I walked past, huffing and puffing and drenched with sweat.  I really wanted a nap!

As much as that saying reminds me how undisciplined I really am, it’s true.  If I want to lose weight, I will choose healthier foods and make exercise a priority.  If I want to enjoy an entire box of peanut butter stuffed Oreos, I will pour myself a glass of milk and get started.  The question is, what do I really want?

Every day I’m faced with decisions that reflect what I want at the time.  Do I want a clean clothes to wear to work tomorrow, or do I want to watch a biography of Guy Fieri on the Food Network?  Guy, by the way, is a very passionate, disciplined person. 

The perfectionist in me gets so frustrated with the inquisitive, hedonistic me.  I want to make my goals and go after them on one hand, and I want to enjoy the journey on the way.  I want so many things that I can’t be single-minded about any of them.

I know I am extremely blessed with what I already have, and maybe that makes me too complacent.  If I don’t work for what I want, I’m the only one who will know that there could be something better down the road.  On the other hand, shouldn’t I treat myself with the same respect as I would anyone else?

I don’t have any answers, although I’m trying to be more forgiving of myself when I don’t measure up to my own expectations, without giving up on my goals.  I’m going to make a living as a writer.  I’m not sure how I’m going to get there, but I’m going to keep at it until I get there.  Because that’s what I really want.

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Discovering Happiness

What makes you happy? Since I have a Bachelor’s in psychology, I could tell you that nothing can make you feel a certain way.  You choose to perceive the circumstances around you and interpret those thoughts into feelings.  What fun is that? Julie Andrews sang about “My Favorite Things” in the movie, “Sound of Music”: Raindrops on roses and whiskers on kittens Bright copper kettles and warm woolen mittens Brown paper packages tied up with strings… Cream colored ponies and crisp apple strudels Doorbells and sleigh bells and schnitzel with noodles Wild geese that fly with the moon on their wings… Girls in white dresses with blue satin sashes Snowflakes that stay on my nose and eyelashes Silver white winters that melt into springs These are a few of my favorite things I’m not quite as poetic, but here a few of my favorite things: May sunshine, warming my face and arms Rich dark chocolate,
Read more

A Beautiful Life

Image
Elizabeth Taylor is still stealing headlines weeks after her death. Who was Liz Taylor? Why was she called “Liz” when she didn’t even like the nickname? How could someone who was so adored by the public seem to be constantly seeking love? I’m too young to appreciate who Elizabeth Taylor was in her glory days. I can look at her pictures, at that fabulous hair, itty bitty waist, gorgeous skin, and dark eyes (some people say her eyes were violet). She was an accomplished actress and Oscar winner, well known for her roles such as Cleopatra . She was actually a British citizen, born in London, ballet dancing virtually from birth. Her father was an art dealer, her mother, a stage actress. Practically after setting foot on American soil at the age of ten, she was in the movies. Less than a decade later, she was pursuing what some considered her second career: marriage. Seven husbands, eight marriages , spanning over 40 years. How could someone so loved by the public struggle to find love
Read more

The Pink Slip

I haven't blogged for awhile.  At some point I decided that writing daily was never going to get me to the writing career I longed for.  However, since I am recently unemployed (technically self-employed with a tiny paycheck), I thought maybe sharing my experiences in that category might be helpful to others. I've always felt the most for those who have been laid off because there wasn't enough work, or there were budget cuts, or the position was eliminated.  No one feels sorry for the person who was fired. That's me.  Fired, canned, terminated, given the pink slip.  I had been joking for years that I looked forward to that day.  It wasn't that great, after all.  Although I don't believe I deserved it, no one wants to hear that.  It doesn't matter that Indiana is an at-will employment state, and that my employer did just that- fired me without a good reason.  I didn't complete a project because I was working overtime with what I had always been tol
Read more