Monday, June 15, 2009

Better than Rubies

“For wisdom is more precious than rubies, and nothing you desire can compare with her.” –Proverbs 8:11

Wisdom is difficult to understand or appreciate. In a society where truth is considered an arbitrary subject, and tolerance is valued more highly than what is right, wisdom becomes something of past generations, gained merely be life experience.

Even though I seek wisdom, I don’t ever feel wise. It seems like daily I have decisions to make and I rarely feel confident that I’m choosing the right path. I have this twisted desire to interfere in the lives of others- to give them advice or provide for them- and never know for sure what the right thing to do is.

I am also horrible at organizing my time, things, or finances. I know what I value, but it’s difficult to make tough decisions. For example, I play flute in the church orchestra. I originally signed up to get my husband involved. The problem is, I haven’t played in a group since sixth grade. It’s like a 12 year old trying to read War and Peace. I’m in way over my head. I keep a fingering chart nearby because I can’t always remember the notes, and a change in key signature throws me for a major loop.

At rehearsal last night, I asked myself why I was doing it. It’s nice to be well-rounded, and to re-learn a skill. I enjoy the company of the other musicians. On the other hand, I hate not being good at something. It took me about ten minutes just to get tuned. I was just glad the other flute player was busy with her high school graduation party. I’m going to have to practice, and how am I going to find time to do that with four ballgames scheduled this week?

As a teenager, I was once told I was wise beyond my years. The problem is I think my years caught up with my wisdom.

James 1:5 says “If any of you lacks wisdom, he should ask God, who gives generously to all without finding fault, and it will be given to him.”

So, if I tell you I’m a praying person, it’s not to brag about my spirituality. It’s because I lack wisdom! I find comfort in placing all of my doubts, fears, worries, concerns, and misgivings into the hands of God. I believe He knows what to do with them. I know He has a plan, even if I can only see a small portion at a time. He gives me enough wisdom for today. That’s really all I need, after all.

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